It took a long time to realise that everyone has the right to a voice. It wasn’t until halfway through University that I finally learnt that this also included myself. I then realised that I could put that and my experiences to a good use. This site intends to help survivors unlearn the deceit and lies through providing help on what other survivors have found useful and to educate those around you.
Why did I decide to do this? The older I become and the more of the world I see, it becomes more and more apparent that violence against women is still such a taboo subject and that most would rather it was not mentioned. Regardless of the fact that in the UK alone, 1 in 4 women will have experienced domestic violence at least once in their lifetime. Approximately one billion people worldwide, that are alive today, have grown up being involved in or witness to domestic violence. This impact has an adverse effect on the psychological development of those subjected to this monstrosity. Even with these facts, our society still fails to accept that violence towards women is one of the largest social issues globally.
There still seems to be this outdated belief that unless a woman has a black eye, then nothing is going on. Just like with the excuse of how a woman dresses seems to translate into ‘her asking for it’. It’s about time that society is educated on the reality of violence towards women. Including the long-lasting effects on all involved. Even throughout my own quest to unlearn the lies that I learnt as a child is that very few will allow you to speak freely on this subject. Whether this is society themselves or even practitioners who are ‘trained’ in these situations. Both would prefer to see me stay silent. (Being Northern it’s usually impossible for us to stay quiet when we have something to say so this doesn’t help.)
With what seems to be a result of this inability to understand, there still is, even today, a lack of support for survivors (yes survivors- not victims). It’s 2018 and Survivors are still being referred to as ‘battered women and children’. Even the UK Government plans to remove funding from short-term supported housing. 53% of the charity Refuge has funding come from the housing benefit that the government is wanting to cut. This proves that even our government doesn’t understand how vital a shelter of safety is let alone understand why sufficient support is essential.
Over the next few weeks, I will be writing about why those who have experienced adversities prefer not to be described or labelled as victims along with what is a more suitable term.
“Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender, that is strength.” –Mahatma Gandhi